Busy, busy, busy. Lately I’ve been all kinds of busy. With 12 plus hour work days my schedule has been: wake up, go to work, go home sleep, wake up, rinse and repeat. And the weekends seem to go by faster than a blink. I did manage to get my taxes mostly finished (much thanks to my Dad and Turbo Tax). I payed a lot of estimated taxes throughout the year. By the end I had to pay a good amount to State, but received a larger portion back from Federal. I suppose I could complain about the ridiculous amount of taxes I’ve had to pay, but instead I’ll just be happy that by the end of the year I’ve got more in my account than I started with. And it sure was nice to get a new laptop and pay off my car this year.

I did manage to watch two bad movies last weekend, Jumper and The Fountain. Well, it isn’t that they were bad so much as they just weren’t very good. Jumper had a potentially interesting premise, but that’s about as far as it got. The characters were boring, the plot felt about as pasted together as a third grade craft project, and the special effects (while nicely done) were by no means spectacular or unique. With Hollywood focusing so much on great special effects these days, the standard has been raised too high, so that anything falling short of utterly amazing just feels ho-hum.

What’s that? Two people fighting in mid-air as they fall from a building?

Seen it.

A person lunching atop the Sphinx’s head amidst the Great Egyptian Pyramids?

Old Hat.

A double decker bus appearing out of nowhere and careening through the desert?

Yawn.

I just felt like the movie really had nothing to offer me as the viewer. For me, two of the most important parts of any movie are the characters and story. Jumper didn’t have either of those going for it. Even Samuel L Jackson couldn’t save this one, though perhaps if it had more snakes…

And thus I was reminded yet again why I don’t go to the theater all that much anymore. It usually ends up being a waste of my time and money. And even if the movie turns out to be a (surprisingly) good one, I’d gladly watch it in the comfort of my own home over the “glamor” of the silver screen. I guess I’m just lame and unexciting that way.

Unlike Jumper, I watched The Fountain at home. While still not a movie I’d recommend, it at least had some redeeming qualities. The cinematography was artistically beautiful, the special effects were well done, and the acting was substantial (yay for Hugh Jackman). However, the whole thing didn’t really make sense. From the strange blend of various religions to the constant repetition of specific scenes, it failed to keep one foot in reality. Perhaps it had the tip of a toe, but that is not enough for me. Furthermore, I can’t say I really like or agree with the little sense it did make. It could be that a reworking of the theme and a more logical connection between the three ongoing plots would have done it some good. I have the capacity to enjoy some strange movies, but they have to be strange for a reason.

Stories are much easier to listen to than they are to tell.

The great difficulties of life come not in the discussion of its meaning but in living out of one filled with meaning.

I’ve often wished that I was more of an observer in life. Removed. Distant. Neutral. Calculating. Learning, but not participating. Fully aware and yet unaffected by my surroundings. However, I know it is foolish to desire such a role. Living in this world demands involvement and no man, woman, or child is an island. We are more like the waves, pushing, carrying, rolling over, or crashing against one another. It is good to be observant and to learn from and about one’s surroundings, but it is both impossible and unhealthy to remain unmoved by them.

Many times I have dreaded interaction, confrontation, and involvement, yet I know they are necessary parts of living. To merely float around, seeing and yet not being seen, hearing and yet not being heard is to be as a ghost, and ghosts are dead. I am not here to be dead, but to be alive. And to be alive is to be connected to that great living, breathing, active phenomenon which is creation. I must not hide in the quiet room my own familiar thoughts, while the sun’s glow and the wind’s breath beckon from outside. There are already too many people who will stand back and observe a lost and desperate world fall deeper into helplessness, prescribing vague remedies from the distance of their secluded mind; instead, I must run toward and embrace it with the same strong yet tender hold that has held me up and continues to heal my own inward afflictions.